The Path to a Pup Named Raylan

It’s been a bit since I’ve written anything because every time I would think to write, what was bubbling up was all processing of grief of different sorts. A washing of grief seemed to come back-to-back last year as we lost my beloved aunt, Janet, my most soulful horse, Maximus, and our beautiful senior dog, Jackie, all between August 2022 and the end of January 2023. I wrote about Janet and about Max. But I haven’t even attempted to write about Jackie yet because the feeling of loss just feels tiresome, and I’m avoiding it to be honest. And with her loss being the third one, I almost think I was worn down by it in a different way. Grief is funny like that, isn’t it? It’s deep and wide, heavy and profound, but so many times we just want away from it. I think the compounding of the losses made them each feel like a weight–the losses, not the individuals. And though I like to write, I found myself just sitting a lot with some of those feelings, trying to sort them out and figure out what exactly they were. Grief can show up in so many different ways—sadness being just one. Anger, anxiety, and restlessness are all ways that I’ve dealt with grief as well. And after watching Jackie waste away by late January and tell us it was time to tell her goodbye, things in this house changed again and got eerily quiet. The writing wasn’t really coming for me in that quiet either.

Time is peculiar… Grief feels heavy, and time feels short even though it also feels long and laborious at the same time. Loss makes you appreciate the gifts of who you have in your life and eventually made us want to embrace each day in a fuller way. This was once we absorbed some of the fullness of what grief can bring after the empty feelings settled down a bit. Though it may not be everyone’s path, what we thought would bring some joy for us would be to add a dog to our dog-loving family. And so, the talks and search began.

Our family really likes the dynamic of having three dogs. It feels like the house is right when there is a pack on the farm, and so when the time was right we thought of how to go about adding a new dog to our lives. Never once as a replacement, because you just can’t do that. But as a new normal. One thing that was of utmost importance was that this was our 3-year-old son’s first time adding a dog to his life. Jackie, Mikey, and Snow had all been there since he was born, so we knew this would be a big change for him and we wanted it to be a positive experience. Jackie was a Dutch Shepherd crossed with a Belgian Malinois and we always knew it was a powerful combination. She was a lot of dog and we had to take into consideration that although we loved her to her core, that a dog of the highest drive might not be the right fit for a child. But we did really love the devotion of a herding type of dog. They truly seem to thrive with being with their people, and we thought this was a good fit for our family.

My husband and I own a dog grooming shop, so this allows us to meet a lot of different dogs—which is amazing! Every day there are so many different shapes and sizes and personalities that come in, so we get to experience dogs in a completely different way than the average dog lover. Basically, it means we fall in love with so many dogs and get attached to all of them! HA! We knew we wanted a good type for being at the farm and the shop, but also a good family dog and something with a nice hair coat (being a grooming shop, you fall in love with dog hair, what can we say?). I have always loved Australian Shepherds but knew that the time commitment would be hard for me when I was younger and didn’t have a job that allowed me to bring dogs to work with me. I gravitated towards so many of this breed when they have come into the shop, and so we did our research and decided that we would like to find an Aussie for our family.

Though we love dog rescue, I was seeing that most of the herding dogs in rescue were suggested to not be placed in homes with small children. We decided the best thing for our family was to get a puppy and allow for the pup to grow up learning that August (our son) was another leader in this family. I think as a young kid it’s also super important to have good experiences with dogs and puppies so that kids can become dog lovers for life. We knew this was our top, top priority. Having rescued before, we truly hope to do this again one day with August when he’s a bit older. But for our family, finding a reputable breeder felt like the right choice at this time.

We did our research, asked a lot of questions, and found Flying T Ranch. We loved their experience breeding Aussies and especially that they are certified Good Dog Breeders. This designation means that health testing and high standards in dog and puppy care are of the highest importance in their breeding decisions. Upon reaching out we learned that there was a current litter that would be ready at the end of April and so we decided to reserve a puppy. I wanted a red-tri female puppy, but after finding out this was not a possibility, we asked the breeder which of the litter seemed to be especially suited to be a companion for a three-year-old boy. She noted this little black tri male seemed to be a good fit to be a family dog, so we chose him. And that’s how we ended up with our cutie: Raylan Givens.

He is named for one of our favorite TV shows: Justified. If you haven’t watched it, it’s a good one. It’s easy to follow and the main character, Raylan Givens, is a US Marshal who is quirky, dedicated, and interesting. What’s funny is we may have named him Raylan, but August decided to call him Ray-Ray so that’s stuck the most. My brother messes with August and calls him Bob-Ray. Well, as it turns out that also sticks well, so little Raylan has lots of names to learn!

At the time of this writing, he’s been with us three months and some change and he’s currently 5 months old. I cannot say enough how much fun he added to our lives this past spring and summer! Where things have been quiet and a bit sad due to loss, a puppy enters and reminds you that there is new life and so much to explore in the world. It truly has made us look at our farm with new eyes. The first few weeks were the most work because I hadn’t potty trained a pup since Mikey was little and he was almost 9, but once we got that going with some scheduling it’s been an easy learning curve for him. He’s been a super amiable puppy. Raylan likes to get along, likes the other dogs, explores but isn’t massively independent, and enjoys being with humans the most. But his true bliss is in playing with August. Watching those two learn and enjoy each other these past few months has been such a beautiful experience for me. Herding dogs can be a bit orally fixated due to their drive to move others around, so we’ve had so many teachable moments. We’ve talked about how to train him to be kind and not play-bite with August, and we’ve helped Auggie learn about energy and how his behavior influences Ray-Ray’s so much. We’ve been able to watch the two of them run around the front yard with absolute GLEE. You can’t help but laugh and smile when you see two young ones with so much energy enjoying a good frolic.

I had level-set expectations that as a three-year-old, August may tire of the constant busy side of puppy life and the fact that he would have to keep his toys more separate from the living room so that they would not be chewed on. But I have been pleasantly surprised at his insistence on helping. He loves feeding Ray and knows that as soon as he does, they need to go directly outside to let him do his business. August will start putting his rubber boots on as soon as he’s done feeding so he’s ready to take his puppy out. He loves brushing Raylan and playing with him. The annoyances of play biting have been maybe more annoying to the adults than to August because August loves telling Ray, ‘We don’t do that. Be geeeeentle…..’ It’s almost as if my only child decided he has a younger sibling to take care of and mold. That’s been a very sweet thing to witness.

But Ray also just is a good sort of pup. He follows us everywhere. He learned quickly that our other dogs are kind and he follows their lead. He’s not overly stimulated by the horses and enjoys exploring around the barn. He knows to sit and watch us from his puppy pen when we eat, and that he doesn’t participate in that part of our lives, lol. He lies in the bathroom if we let him when August takes a bath at night and wants to lie on the floor in his room while we read a bedtime story. That’s like dream-come-true stuff that you just don’t expect from a 5-month-old puppy! I think the good Lord knew that our child needed a balanced and sweet soul and that a happy individual would make this farm smile after some tough months. It will be interesting to see how he grows and changes with independence and the natural development that happens for puppies. But for now, we are enjoying every step of the way and can honestly say that even though some may look at our life and see so much to take care of, that really these beautiful souls take care of us in so many ways that we could never thank them enough. Here’s to the start of a wonderful journey with Raylan and to the joy and happy energy that a good dog can bring to a family!

*Follow the farm on Instagram at @Dreamalot_farm_life if you’d like. We have a lot of fun!